Maximizing Our Moments

I was thinking about my father today who passed almost 30 years ago. I began to recall some moments that brought a smile to my face and laughter to my heart. Also, I thought about some missed opportunities and time we didn’t spend together. Well, I believe we can all attest to these types of memories and feelings. There are points in our lives where we don’t take enough consideration into the time we spend with one another and we take time for granted as if we KNOW there is a next time, tomorrow or later; however that is not the truth for any of us and all we have is the moment in which we live. Now, I’m not trying to step on your toes, but I’m aiming for your heart. I do want you to think about the amount time and energy you put into maximizing your moments with those around you.

It’s very easy to say things in gest like, “I’ll call you later,” “see you later,” “we’ll do that some other time” or “I don’t have time today.” Oh yes, we are all guilty as charged. When I consider the times I put off spending time with others or I didn’t say “I love you” before leaving with the thought that I could do it the next time, I shudder at my negligence. Today, my mother is 82 years old and has dementia. For those of you who know anything about this disease, it is very debilitating on the mind specifically on the short term memory. She was diagnosed about 5 years ago and for all intense purposes is holding her own. What I appreciate is the time we spent together before her diagnosis and the conversations we had over the years and how she has always has been my “rock.” Well, needless to say the roles have changed, but I understand that my mother has always been there for me and now it is time for me to do the same. Even though her memory is not what it used to be, I still have to maximize the moments I have with her. We can still laugh at certain things and sometimes we sit in silence, but I wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world just to be near her. For each visit we have I have no idea which one will be the last one, but I must strive to do all I can to be present. I shared this very personal side of me with you because it’s important to understand we have no control over life and we don’t know when the last time is upon us.

One of the most crucial issues occurs when we are upset with someone and an apology needs to be extended. This is a very serious situation that should never happen, especially when we choose to leave without apologizing, angry or in haste. When hurtful words have been spoken and you have no guarantee there is going to be another opportunity to rectify or mend the situation this is the time to pause and make things right. Maximize the moment, it is all you have, that moment in time, that right here, right now moment. The mistake we make is behaving as if we will be extended some type of “do over,” but often that is a false perception that will lead us down a path of many regrets and disappointments.

The poem entitled “The Last Time” from Poetry In Different Colors gives us a sneak preview of the story we are writing with our lives as we take time for granted. The basis of the poem is what was just mentioned in the previous paragraph about not using time to spend with others and not following up. Trust me, I am guilty of using the words “I’ll call you back” and not doing so. It wasn’t my intent to not follow up but I allowed the day to get in the way and conclude without calling back. It’s not to say we should live our lives in fear of the ones we love passing away, but it’s more about maximizing the moments. What that entails is giving all of yourself in the moments you have with others whether it is in person or on the telephone. Don’t postpone saying those things that mean the most, take and make time for the people in your life. One of the most regrettable moments is when we lose someone that we did not maximize our time with. The saying is “seize the moment” and we should always strive to do just that. There are 24 hours in everyone’s day therefore no one is getting more or less time than you, it’s just a matter of how we choose to use our time. With that being said, do not allow “busy” to rob you of engaging with the people in your life. Live your life in the reality of not knowing what the future holds and living out each day as if it is the last time, let us MAXIMIZE OUR MOMENTS.

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