Category Archives: perseverance

We All Have Wings

We all have experienced negative and hurtful words

And some things told we choose not to repeat what we heard

But despite the wounds created that seem they won’t heal

We have to be strong enough to overcome how we feel

We all have wings even when we do not think so

It’s just a matter of using them as we begin to grow

When words are spoken CAN’T, WON’T, EVER, NEVER

Take on the challenge and be even better

Than they ever thought we could be

What we have is more than they can see

We all have wings that need to spread

And take us on our course to get ahead

Misconceptions we should disregard

Or we will remain exactly where we are

We are eagles with an altitude unknown to man

Which tells me whatever the goal, “yes we can”

Chart new territory, blaze a new trail

Do whatever our passion drives us to do and

Dismiss the word fail

We all have wings and the ability to fly

So if we have yet to take flight the question is why

Why have we allowed someone to clip our wings?

Prevent us from moving on to greater things

Confidence in ourselves is lesson number one

Fulfilling the greatness of who we are to become

Sandra R Blythe (c) 2016

*If you like this poetry, go to Amazon Kindle for the ebook or http://mkt.com/robnic-enterprise

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Eliminate, Elevate, & Celebrate

As I sat in my room thinking about a life lesson to share on my blog, I went through my book; “The Silence is Too Loud” and the poem “A Product of Your Environment” felt right.  I started processing the high points and thinking about how this could help create an awareness of where we are in our lives.  During this process, I identified how we needed to eliminate the crutch that we are a product of our environment to move to the next level.  There comes a time when we should become strong enough to stand and own what we are as well as where we are in our lives.  And in that moment, we mature where we can see challenges as an opportunity to make good choices.

It’s very “easy” to justify our behavior by stating “that’s how I was raised” or “that’s how my family deals with ….,” as well as saying “I am a product of my environment.”  Eliminate that which is easy as it allows us to be comfortable with why we are in a certain state that is contaminating our life (remember when we’re comfortable we don’t grow).  We look around and find people to place blame as our explanation seems to be that of being victimized by our environment.  Although I will be the first to admit, it is difficult to rise above our circumstances, it is not impossible.  The question becomes, how bad do you want it because taking the easy way out is just that, “easy.”  You can be that person who decides despite circumstances you are making a different choice.  You are taking control and making certain the negative mentality of your environment does not contaminate you.

When we embrace our own destiny and stand on the truth that we do not have to mirror the environment where we were raised then we can celebrate.  As we take these very critical steps we begin to rise above the obstacles and pave a new way which says here is my best and truest version of me.  We stop hiding behind other people’s behavior to justify our mistakes and own our mess and clean it up.

We cannot allow ourselves to feel like victims because we were raised a certain way, lived in a certain neighborhood, attended a certain school or had parents who did not make choices that were in our best interest.  Life happens and we can make better choices and be greater in our own right.  We must eliminate the negativity that haunts us while elevating to the platform that allows us to stretch and reach our goals.  Then we can celebrate our accomplishments knowing that our environment did not hinder our destination for success.

Knowing the Power of Your Voice

I am excited as I have embarked on this new journey with my second poetry book, “The Silence is Too Loud.”  As it was with “Poetry in Different Colors,” this book too captures life lessons.  Today, I wanted to open the door with something powerful that most of you will be able to connect with.

The world in which we live changes based on the efforts of the people.  Consider the fact that there are changes which arise through the effort of one person and that one person causes a domino effect.  Individually, we can be responsible for creating movements that can help or even sometimes hinder depending on the intent.  But for now, I am speaking in the positive and speaking to the power of positive change.  What hinders change many times is the silence which holds us captive and we choose not to speak out.  The perception of not being able to make a difference or thinking “I’m just one person” has long been the paralysis that prohibits progress.

We have been conditioned to believe that majority rules which in many instances deters us from being a part of the minority.  Our fear is that we will be the “odd man out” and powerless without the support of the majority.  Is it possible that what starts out as the minority could change and become the majority?  I say that it is not only possible but has been proven.  There are moments where other people feel and think the same as you but are waiting for someone else to speak up before they make their own position known.  Walking alone is not always easy, but in the pursuit of what is right and the betterment of a situation, it is necessary.  When people recognize the power of your voice, they may be inclined to join in and use their voice as well.  The one person becomes two and the two become many and invariably it results in a group that is making a difference to bring about change.

If we see there is a need to be filled, we cannot wait for someone else to initiate, nor should we believe that as one we do not matter.  Your voice is more powerful than you know and your silence is a black hole that some hope you fall into.

Surviving is Not Enough

I was pondering the word “survivor” and I begin to feel like the word cheapened one’s experience.  It started to feel like you were saying “I’m making it,” “I’m getting by,” or “I’m doing what I can.”  All of those statements seemed so mediocre and that’s not what we should want for our lives.  So, I thought why not discover what it is to be more than a survivor and begin to release yourself from the mediocracy that exist.  Perhaps we dream too small when we say “if I could just….” We kill the thought when we say “just” and lessen our expectation for what we want to accomplish.  We go back to “just getting by” when we expect “just enough.”  Why are we afraid to dream big and expect it to happen?   Perhaps, we want to keep our dreams within what we think is “reasonable.”  The greater the dream of what you want to do, the more unreasonable it may be that you’ll succeed, so you hold on to desiring “just enough.”  There we go, we’re back in the survival lane and our dreams cannot be realized staying in “just enough.”  Give yourself permission to dream great things and do all that is in your power to make it happen as well as speak it into your life.   Have your disappointments been so frequent that you have given up on something greater than what you have and it’s a matter of surviving?  There are times we allow our disappointments to get the best of us, it seems that they become a regular fixture in our life.  Unfortunately, we begin to believe the best we can hope for is surviving the day or having “just enough” to make it.  We think what we speak and what we speak begins to manifest in our behavior as well as in our expectations or lack thereof.  Lesson number one, stop saying “if I could just.”   Know “just” is never going to be enough and is below your standards of what you can do with your life.

I often share my triumph with breast cancer and now entering year 12 of being cancer free, I must admit I have said in the past I am a breast cancer “survivor;” however in retrospect I believe I cheapen the experience of what has happened.  I am a breast cancer CONQUEROR who has been TRIUMPHANT in having the VICTORY over breast cancer by the grace of God and that is so much more than “just surviving.”  Knowing that, I see my life as much more than surviving which has allowed me to move into a different dimension of my life that is eager, willing and ready to take on whatever challenges come my way.  I don’t think about surviving, I do think about having the victory and that entices me to reach the goal.  Our power lies in the words that we speak (as long as we speak them in truth); if we can believe it, we can conceive it and we will achieve it.  Let’s consider using powerful words to replace survivor, such as conqueror or to say we were triumphant or victorious in our pursuit.  Words are powerful vehicles that we build our thoughts upon and can only move when we give them life.  The more powerful the word, the stronger we can become.  Our thinking and speech drive our destinations whether we realize it or not. When you think about someone saying “I survived the day,” does that sound powerful to you?  Does it sound like the person did something noteworthy or simply just made it through?  We both know that statement gives absolutely no power to what the person accomplished by surviving the day.  If we strive to be conquerors, be triumphant, or be victorious, it sheds a different light and a different feeling about what we have done.  Then we can begin to broaden our expectations and heighten our dreams beyond that which is minimal.  Our greatest fears are conquered by our greatest accomplishments.  Stop thinking about surviving and start seeing yourself as a person of victory.  It may take some work, but once you arrive in the space of more than a survivor, you will understand why surviving is not enough.

 

Re-Inventing the Game

As we swiftly come to the conclusion of 2015, I thought it would be appropriate to talk about “re-inventing the game.”  First, I feel it’s necessary to clarify that I don’t want to discuss the typical conversation of an empty New Year’s Resolution that will result in potential failure.  My desire is to address a lifestyle change that has absolutely nothing to do with a “New Year’s Resolution.”  It’s wonderful to be able to assess where you are in your life and the obstacles that are prohibiting you from arriving at your destination.

In one of my previous postings I touched on the concept of being your own worse enemy and the reason for not moving forward is that we allow others to be blockers.  However, in the course of this self-assessment it also lends itself to the courage or lack thereof that sometimes keeps us stuck.  Make no mistake this will cause you to rethink the concept of life you have previously embraced and it will take courage to move.  While we are able to see the mistakes we’ve made there is a reality that we can re-invent who we are by changing the game and beginning to travel in a different direction.   The beauty of re-inventing is merely the idea of a being able to start from ground zero and build your way up to what you want to be.  If you concern yourself with other people and their perception, you may find yourself unable to take this journey.  People tell you that you’re too old, it’s too late and the ship has sailed.  Well, my question is who made those rules and who said that they were applicable to every situation.

Let me share a secret with you, but don’t go telling everyone because this information is just for you.  At 42 years of age, I went back to college and got my Bachelor’s Degree.  Once I graduated I told my friends I was through with school, only to find myself 3 months later back at school working on my Master’s Degree.  I completed my Master’s Degree and… oh no, I didn’t dare enroll for my Ph.D, but thanks for thinking I was that ambitious.  The point is I arrived at a point in my life where I began to re-invent the game.  I didn’t allow anyone to tell me it was too late, I was too old or the ship had sailed, as a matter fact I was totally focused on what was best for me.  As I had shared before I wrote my first book after the age of 50 and life keeps getting better.  Here’s the deal, in order for me to go back to school and write a book and releasing two CDs, I had to change some of things that were going on in my life by reviewing, renewing, and releasing some of the intruders I had allowed in my circle.  Let’s be honest there are people who can (if we allow) become blockers in our journey and keep us from evolving to that next level.  Next, I had to change my perception, you know, the way I perceived life and what I was capable of accomplishing.  I know we often hear perception is some people’s reality, but I say reality is not a perception.  Reality is the truth of a situation and regardless of how we perceive it, the truth doesn’t change.

Thank you for taking the journey with me this year.  Continue to be the best you and spread your wings to reinvent the game.  You got this!  Stay with me as I continue to post in 2016 as we still have much to talk about.

From An Eagle’s View

I’m always excited about writing for my blog although it takes me a moment to decide what to share. After scanning through my book, Poetry in Different Colors, my poem “My Friend with Wings” caught my eye and began to stir emotions so I thought what a great poem to expound upon and share some insight.

When I wrote “My Friend with Wings” it was out of admiration for a dear friend who never ceases to amaze me. It’s his zeal for life that I subscribe to, my friend has a unique view of life. When we look at life and how we survive, it is necessary to have an attitude of optimism and for every failure we must have the attitude of how we can do it better and what we should do next. The non-acceptance of failure doesn’t mean we don’t identify with it but our goal should be that we look for ways to turn our failures into triumphs. Never settle for contentment, as it is not your destination but a stage of your pursuit of success. You move from contentment to creation from creation to triumph. The attitudes we have toward our life dictates the time and energy we will provide in the motions of our journey.

It has been quoted that our “attitude determines are altitude” and I am inclined to believe that. Many times I find we become our own worst critics, which in such a state handicaps us from evolving and being risk takers that will ultimately transform us. We spend time talking about our failures and give little credence to our accomplishments. Consequently, when new challenges are in front of us, we are sometimes apprehensive and even fearful of moving forward; however from an eagle’s view such fear is not comprehensible. The height that an eagle flies is incomprehensible. We should aspire to be like an eagle and have strong muscular legs which allow us to bounce back from temporary setbacks and stand tall in the newness of our recovery. If we adopt the eagle’s attribute of extremely powerful eyes, our vision will not always be understood by others; however it will motivate us to succeed. This is an incredible bird that gives wonderful insight on how humans can operate within their space, while recognizing the potential to elevate to a higher level. Our greatest limitations are the ones we have created in our own mind..

Disappointment – Cause and Affect

“It’s not people who disappoint us but our expectations.” This statement was made to me by a co-worker of mine a few years ago. Many days I reflect on this and try to weigh the truth of the statement. While we all have certain expectations which are typically based on our moral standards and principles is this the compass we use for other people? Why are we disappointed when people act a certain way? I believe we do set standards for people we interact with and when those standards are not met inevitably we are disappointed. Disappointment is a part of our life cycle but there is a way to avoid some of those disappointing moments. It has nothing to do with recalibrating our moral compass, but everything to do with acknowledging the difference between who we are and those who we engage. You can give yourself permission to have expectations of other people with the understanding that if those folks are cut from a different cloth, they may not be able to live up to your expectations. However, there are some basic things you seek to receive from people such as mutual respect, consideration and honesty. Probably one of the greatest disappointments you suffer is when people are not honest with you and have chosen to use deception rather than providing the truth of the matter. This is challenging for some depending on the subject, but it is always the right thing to do. Yet, people can struggle with being honest for fear of the consequences that may follow from the honesty extended. The truth about disappointment is that it can cause some people to form a wall where he or she will not allow people to get close and therefore be shielded from that emotion (so they think).

Perhaps one can set the stage for disappointment when the proper measures are not taken. I know you’re probably thinking exactly what does that mean. In my book, Poetry in Different Colors there is a poem entitled No Loss to Cut which speaks to how we romanticize who people are and allow them into our lives under a false perception. You can become entangled in a relationship and create expectations based on something that really doesn’t exist and subsequently think the person should live up to your inaccuracy of who they are. Admittedly people sometimes perpetrate and give false signals as to the character of who they are and if we don’t allow time to get to know the person we will buy in to it. However, with this poem it evolves on the premises of embracing the true character and acknowledging that the person may not be a good fit for you. You are probably familiar with the statement “cut your losses” however there are times when we walk away from a relationship and there is no loss to cut. Disappointment can be minimized in such an instance when you can identify you didn’t lose the prize because you are the prize, nothing disappointing about that at all.

The other poem in Poetry in Different Colors is Move Too Soon which paints a picture of a person in a hurry to secure the ideal person and has blurred vision about exactly who they are engaging with. A gambit of emotions arise from the experience and disappointment is implied through the writing, but to help counter the disappointment you take the lesson and use wisdom for future encounters. Maybe it can be said that disappointment has two sides to it, the emotion and the lesson. Obviously disappointment lends itself to how we feel, but the lesson from the disappointment should cause us to move differently going forward so that we can avoid the same or similar pitfalls. How we deal with our disappointments will always be determined by how we perceive them. When you feel disappointed take it as a whistle blowing which indicates get up, dust yourself off and keep going. Remember when you are disappointed wallowing in self-pity is not an option and that’s not even cute!